Terms of Use
Our lawyers made us include
it and made us use a precious button on our home page to get you here.
At first, we thought the lawyers were a real pain. But then we read the
page. What a Netwakening! It's really important stuff. We took the
legalese the lawyers wrote and translated it into readable English. So
be a smart nethead and read the stuff on this page. It could prevent
you from hearing from our lawyers, or worse yet, from really nasty
people, like prosecutors.
Here's
the deal:
We run
this site so that people like you (and
people you like) can use it for personal entertainment, information,
education, communication, and cybergratification. So go ahead and
browse around all you like. You can even download stuff from the site
but only for non-commercial, personal use. If you do, though, don't
fool around with the copyright and other notices all over the stuff.
They're there for a really good reason. And don't even think about
distributing, modifying, transmitting, reusing, re-posting, or anything
else un-cool with any of the stuff, including the text, images, audio,
and video, for public or commercial purposes unless we give you written
permission. And it's not likely we will.
If you visit our site, you're
also
legally obligated to the terms and conditions listed below and any
other law or regulation that applies to the site, the Internet, the
World Wide Web. You shouldn't access or browse the site if you have any
problem with that, because once you start, there's no turning back --
you are bound by [read: stuck with] the terms and conditions.
So here's
the scoop on our Top Eleven Rules for Cybersurfers who hang out on our
site:
1. For
everyone's sake, just assume
that everything on the site is copyrighted unless we say it's not. So
you can't use the stuff except how we say you can on this page or
anywhere else on the site without our written permission. And like we
said before, it's not likely we'll give you permission anyway. In fact,
even if we wanted to, the lawyers are likely to veto any deal anyway.
So it's better you don't even ask.
2.
While we try to include accurate
stuff on the site & information products, we're not promising
you
it's accurate. In fact, we're not promising you anything except fun and
entertainment. So if you use stuff on the site & information
products, you're using it at your own risk. Don't call us if there's a
problem because we assume no liability or responsibility for errors or
omissions on the site.
3. We
and anybody else who helped
us create, produce, or deliver the site are not liable for any damages
you suffer when you use it. In particular, the lawyers want you to know
that our disclaimer includes "direct, incidental, consequential,
indirect, or punitive damages arising out of your access to, or use of,
the site. Without limiting the foregoing, everything on the site is
provided to you 'AS IS' WITHOUT WARRANTY OF ANY KIND, EITHER EXPRESSED
OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING, BUT NOT LIMITED TO, THE IMPLIED WARRANTIES OF
MERCHANTABILITY, FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE, OR NON INFRINGEMENT.
Please
note that some jurisdictions
may not allow the exclusion of implied warranties, so some of the above
exclusions may not apply to you. Check your local laws for any
restrictions or limitations regarding the exclusion of implied
warranties. Urgh! What a mouthful from the mouthpieces. We put all of
that in quotes because we couldn't figure out any other way to say it
that the lawyers would accept. But here's the bottom line -- we're not
responsible if you're browsing around and the site damages you or your
computer or infects it with any nasty viruses. We sure hope that
doesn't happen, but if it does, don't call us.
4. If
you don't want the world to
know something, don't post in on the site in any bulletin board or
anyplace else. That's because anything you disclose to us is ours.
That's right -- ours. So we can do anything we want with the stuff you
post. We can reproduce it, disclose it, transmit it, publish it,
broadcast it, and post it someplace else. We can even send it to your
mother (as soon as we find her address). Not only that, we can even use
any ideas, concepts, know-how, or techniques you post any way we want
to, including, developing, manufacturing and marketing products or
other stuff using the information you post.
5.
Pictures of people or places
shown on the site are either our property or someone else's property
we're using with their permission. No matter what, it's definitely not
your property. You or any of your net-friends can't use it unless we
said you could on this page or somewhere else on the site. And guess
what -- we won't say yes. So be careful, Bunky, because unauthorized
use may violate all sorts of nasty laws. Be smart, keep the stuff you
download to yourself.
6.
There's also a lot of
trademarks, logos, and service marks on the site that either we own or
we're using with someone else's permission. So don't think you have any
kind of license or right to use them, because you don't and we're not
about to give you one. If you don't leave them alone and mess with our
trademarks, logos and service marks on our site, we'll probably go
ballistic, so will the companies that own the other trademarks, logos
and service marks. That means that we're likely to sue you or to ask a
prosecutor to come after you for messing around with our property or
the property of others.
7.
You'll probably notice we've
linked our site to lots of others. While that's cool, it doesn't mean
we've looked at all those sites, much less checked them out
periodically to see what's going on. So don't blame us if some site you
link to is bad or has stuff on it that offends you or your pets. Go
ahead and link, but remember, you're doing it at your risk.
8. That
brings us to what you do on
our own site. While we occasionally listen in on chat groups, or look
at the posting in our discussion groups or on our bulletin boards, we
take no responsibility and assume no liability for the content of those
locations or for any mistakes, defamation, libel, slander, omissions,
falsehoods, obscenity, pornography, or profanity you might encounter
when you visit such places on our site. And don't be stupid by posting
or transmitting any unlawful, threatening, libelous, defamatory,
obscene, scandalous, inflammatory, pornographic, nasty, mean, or
profane material or any material that law enforcement types may
consider a criminal offense, get someone in court on a civil lawsuit,
or for that matter violate any law -- anywhere, anytime. While we
certainly respect your privacy, we have no choice but to fully
cooperate with any law enforcement authorities or court which might ask
us who might have posted nasty stuff on our site.
9.
Software that we use on this
Site is protected by all sorts of patriotic U.S. laws. Because of that,
you can't download or send the software to anyone in the vacation
travel spots of Cuba, Iraq, Libya, North Korea, Iran, Syria, or any
other country where United States has embargoed goods; or (get this) to
anyone on the United States Treasury Department's list of Specially
Designated Nationals, the U.S. Commerce Department's Table of Deny
Orders, or the FBI's Most Wanted Internet Creeps List (just kidding on
the last one). As if that were not tough enough, if you live in or are
a national of any of those lovely places, you're not even supposed to
be reading this page, so beat it!
10.
We're also allowed to change
this page and anything else on the site any time we want to. That's
because it's ours and we have the programmers who can do it. If we do
change the page, then you're bound by those changes, too, whenever you
visit our site.
11. If
either of us wants to make
something of it and wants to "sue" (a dirty word) then we have to
follow these rules of engagement. (sort of according to the Geneva
Convention):
To the extent you have in any
manner violated or threatened to violate www.bloggerspaycheck.com
with John Yeo and/or its affiliates ' intellectual property rights,
www.bloggerspaycheck.com with John Yeo and/or its affiliates may
seek injunctive or other appropriate relief in any state or federal and
you consent to exclusive jurisdiction and venue in such courts.
Any other disputes will be
resolved as follows:
If a
dispute arises under this
agreement, we agree to first try to resolve it with the help of a
mutually agreed-upon mediator. Any costs and fees other than attorney
fees associated with the mediation will be shared equally by each of
us.
If it
proves impossible to arrive
at a mutually satisfactory solution through mediation, we agree to
submit the dispute to binding arbitration, under the rules of the
American Arbitration Association. Judgment upon the award rendered by
the arbitration may be entered in any court with jurisdiction to do so.
"Blogger's
Paycheck" is the trademarks of www.bloggerspaycheck.com with
John Yeo and cannot be used without the written permission of
www.bloggerspaycheck.com with John Yeo.
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